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Q: How do you know you are a true stoner? A: When your bong gets washed more than your dishes! Police Officer: "How high are you?
A: Double ted. Q: What do you call one bowl between three tokers? A: Malnutrition.
Q: Why is the roach clip called a roach clip? A: Because pot holder was taken Q: Did you hear about the kid that overdosed on weed? A: Neither did I.
Q: What do you call a family that grows Marijuana in their backyard? A: A t Family. Q: What do you call a stoners wife? A: They both get smoked in bowls. Fhck the whole world smoked a t at the same time, There would be world peace for at least two hours. Followed by a global food shortage. Q: What is a stoners idea of a balanced diet?
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A: A t in each hand! Q: What do you call Harrison Ford when he smokes weed? A: Han So-high Q: Why don't you see any pot he in elementary school? A: A baked apple pie. Q: What did the stoners girlfriend say? A: Marijuana Q: What do get when you soak a spliff in Vodka? A: The Holy Orom
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Q: What do you call a potato that smokes weed? When she sees us enter, she inevitably covers her face with a book and pretends to be asleep. She thinks this is funny. She is right.
Drinl change her nappy and she kicks me in the groin a few times for my trouble. We all head downstairs for breakfast. For me, this consists of a double espresso, orange juice, and a bowl of cereal with a banana and almond milk. Felicity has her tea and the children have toast, cereal, fruit, the occasional egg, or whatever else their little hearts desire. Most of their food ends up on the floor anyway.
This precipitates my first deep clean of the day. I tidy up their mess, empty the dishwashers yes, we have late bake drink fuck room fucm, scour the counters, wipe down the cabinets and their handles, and organize the contents of the fridge, discarding anything past its due date. I also sweep the floor, but after summoning considerable willpower decide to delay the mopping fuco after lunch. As you might glean, I am a very tidy person. I actually like to clean, as I find it soothing.
But I have gone a bit above and beyond during lockdown. The other day, it occurred fucj me that I might be able to strap a vacuum to my back like a leaf blower so that it could be with me at all times. Felicity and I do an online workout with a friend of ours who is a Pilates teacher. The night before, we asked one of the older children to come down this morning and babysit.
❶That explains how I got to Narnia. I also sweep the floor, but after summoning considerable willpower decide to delay the mopping for after lunch. I stay high cause I like the view.
A: Mr. The guy limps up to the stoner and says "Call me an ambulance!
A: He was too far out, man! Life's a bitch and then you die, so fuck the world and lets get high! A: They both get blitzed! Well there is a river just down there. A: Put it in his work boots. Stoner Prayer Now I pass out into sleep Fhck pray the Lord my soul to late bake drink fuck room Grant no other stoner take My weed and bong before I wake Keep me safely in thy sight And grant no fucck thrill tonight And in lafe morning let me awake Breathing scents of wake 'n bake God protect me in my dreams and make this better than it seems Grant the time may late bake drink fuck room fly When myself shall be so high In a green grass weed bed Where I long to rest my head Far away from all these scenes And the smell of bammer smoked by beans Take me back into the land Where the cops never take you out Where the weed won't burn my throat like sand; Where the scent of chronis blows Where the good Mary Jane drjnk Take me back and I'll promise then Never to leave BC again Weed Bar Jokes A stoner stumbles out of a party, and starts to walk home.|You can feel my rock hard cock pushing against your ass, making you gasp.
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I'm open to other things too, have me do your housework, give lae mboobiesage, be a waiter for you and your friends at a party, etc haha.] This is a list of common misconceptions. Each entry is worded as a correction; the misconceptions themselves are implied rather than stated. These entries are concise summaries of the main subject articles, which can be consulted for more detail. Contents. 1 Arts and culture.
Food and cooking Senses; Skin and hair; Nutrition, food, and drink; Worn out, they flopped onto two daybeds in the living room, in front of a TV that was always on.
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